The female protagonist, she rents a house with Lee and Carrie. Generally cranky and mean spirited, she enjoys sporatic bursts of disgusting cheerfulness.
Age: 24
Significant other: n/a
Place of work: The White Rose Cafe - Barista
Likes: Booze, Riot Grrrl, David Cronenburg movies, insulting people, cigarettes
Dislikes: Hippies, her job, her mother, drugs, christmas, cheerleaders
Favourite colour: Purple

The male protagonist, he rents a house with Joss and Carrie. He has been on the verge of an identity crisis for some time and often makes serious dick moves either because he's high or trying to get in some girl's pants.
Age: 29
Significant other: Tara Walton
Place of work: Ted's Bar and Grill - Bartender
Likes: Weed, coke, acid, action movies, sex, industrial music, cigarettes
Dislikes: Arty movies, getting punched, hipsters, children, metal, Mell
Family: Unknown, purchased by Mr. and Mrs. Morris at auction

Joss' best friend since high school, she now rents a house with her and Lee. She's one of those people everybody wishes they could hate.
Age: 25
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: FruityPhone - Call Centre Operator
Likes: Puppies, kitties, ponies, children, weddings, house music, flowers, sunshine
Dislikes: Cigarettes, mean people, dumb blonde jokes, meat, hardcore music
Drink of Choice: Corona

Lee's friend from back in his cosplay days, she likes to dress up as a vampire and inspire drama.
Age: 28
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: The Craft - Vendor (Skull Themed Jewelry)
Likes: Ann Rice, vampires, gossip, skulls, corsets, ice cream
Dislikes: Being called fat, Stephaine Meyer, being ignored, dogs, working
Total Previous Boyfriends: 3

Recently moved into the house with Joss, Lee and Carrie. She is very stern.
Age: 26
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: Maritime Library of Antiquity - Front Desk
Likes: Organizing things, old lady clothes, books, cleaning
Dislikes: Tardiness, disorder, profane language, dirt, skanks, Lee
One thing she never leaves home without: Mace

A friend of Joss, Pandora is possibly a man-eating demon, or maybe just a reclusive weirdo. Either way, she is fucked with by few.
Age: 36
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: The Craft - Vendor (Knitted Goods)
Likes: Knitting, spiders, tattoos, ears in jars, violence
Dislikes: Running water, crocheting, synthetic yarn, vegetables
Total time spent in prison: 17 months

Joss' coworker at the White Rose and drummer in the band Demolicious.
Age: 23
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: The White Rose Cafe - Barista; Mom's Basement Records - Cashier
Likes: Punk music, stripes, moving fast, playing basketball, horses
Dislikes: Slow music, Nick Wyatt, sitting still
Favourite Season: Summer

The woman into whose pants Lee would like to get.
Age: 27
Significant other: Lee Morris
Place of work: Chic Boutique - Make-Up Counter Attendant
Likes: Vodka, tattoos, piercings, money, fast cars, her daddy
Dislikes: Fucking on the first date, commitments, her sister
Pets: Two budgies, shares a Pomeranian named Willikers with her sister

He used to live down the road from Joss and Lee and often asked them for advice. He still pops up from time to time.
Age: 17
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: N/A
Likes: Reading, hair dye, skinny jeans, sad songs, emo girls
DIslikes: Acne, mean emo girls, stupid people, his family, school
Favourite Ice Cream Flavour: Mint Chocolate

Joss' sleazy boss at the cafe.
Age: 52
Significant other: N/A
Place of work: The White Rose Cafe - Owner
Likes: Coffee, money, his car, giving orders, younger woman
Dislikes: His ex wife, rude customers, his bald spot, being rejected by younger women